I haven't been able to take you off my mind.
I can sleep soundly with bombs falling all over, I am now immune to their sounds ...
But seeing you lying there on the dirt is a sight I can't erase from my mind or my nights ...
For the second day in a row I twist and turn in my bed and can't shake you off my eyes. You are there, lying face down, clothes torn, your limbs shredded!!! I wish the sounds of bombs can drown the hissing of that chilly sight.
Yesterday, I had dinner with the Swedish rescue team who came to Beirut to evacuate their citizens. They finished their efforts and wanted to see another aspect of Lebanon besides the current madness, I started conversing with their leader and asked him if they showed your picture on their TV networks and was blown away to know that they don't even know about you and your family, about how you were thrown into the devil's pawns by the very people who supposedly represent the humane face of humanity. (1)
I feel the need to apologize to you for not letting the whole world know what a terrible terrorist threat you have been ... Otherwise how can one explain your fate ... I can't fathom the idea of a human being doing onto you what has been done ... I can't, because I still need to believe in Humans and their Humanity. This is what keeps me going ...this is what I keep waking up to everyday ... I need to believe that Good and Evil are not set by some retard in Washington DC who thinks he has a direct uninterrupted line of communication with God. I wonder what God is telling him now... I wonder if he saw your picture, would he pick up the "line" and dial God???
I don't know your name, but I know that I know you. You are my young sister-in- citizenship of a great country called Lebanon. A country throughout history, never attacked anyone but never ceased to defend itself against invaders.
As I see you lying there in the dirt can't help but wonder what could you have been? Was there another Madame Curie in you? A Helen Keller, a Dorothy Parker, or a Romy Schneider? Could you have been the next Fairouz or May Ziadeh? Or maybe you could just have been another Lebanese mother who rears her children with obsessive care in the beautiful landscape of South Lebanon.
Whatever you could have been was entirely up to you and "they" had no right to take that away from you.
The only way I can get my mind to accept what happened to you is that God must have been short on Angels. May He bless your soul as for sure you are in His kingdom.
(1) The Girl from Marouahine family seeked refuge at a UN post but were turned away. On their way out of town they were blown to pieces by a Nintendo pilot and his smart bombs.